Friday, November 14, 2008

Plans Change

Since most of my followers also follow Wendy, I imagine you've heard/read by now that the last 24 hours have held 2 very unpleasant events that have impacted Wendy quite a bit.

1. Witnessing a neighbor screaming in despair and crumble after her husband committed suicide last night.
2. Wendy's mom and step-dad rolling over their truck and camper/trailer a couple hours ago in Wyoming

(See her blog for full scoops)

My "plan" was to head up to Denver right after work to hang out with BFF Brian, who's there for the weekend. Then probably stay overnight, and come back to the Springs so he can see our new place and the kids, etc.

While I was on the phone with Wendy, she started to cry and say she couldn't handle the thought of me a) traveling with weather/driving conditions the way they are and b) being away for the night.

I knew the right decision, obviously. But to be honest, a part of me was crushed. I was really looking forward to hanging out with Bri, we always have been really connected, and we have a lot to talk about and catch up on. He's still going to come down for a while tomorrow, but...ya know.

So as I'm driving home, I'm trying to focus on loving my wife, and being selfless, but there's that nagging little voice saying "But...!"

In order to trying and squelch that lil' nagger, I turn up the radio (which I had turned down while on the phone), and the first thing I hear is this line: "I'm letting go of the life I planned for me..." (Song: I'm Letting Go by Francesca Battistelli)

And I'm like, "Woah." That did it. So before I got home God changed my heart and attitude. Aside from the benefit of being in the right frame of mind to not have an attitude and be able to love my wife the way she needs right now, I also saw some bright side points, like: 1) gonna save money on gas and food, 2) won't add to the exhaustion I'm already feeling, 3) get to up my word count tonight for NaNoWriMo, which otherwise I'd have zero words today.

Even though the circumstances are difficult, I'm most moved at how quickly and powerfully God moved in me personally today. Thanks, Abba.